Ep. 4.2 The Lion and the Rose

Ramsay is hunting a girl in the woods and has set his dogs on her.  Theon, now Reek, is running and trying to keep up.  Ramsay gets her with an arrow and let the dogs finish her off before she is dead.  His father, Roose Bolton, arrives with his fat Frey wife and wants to see Theon.  Once he sees what Ramsay has done with him he is not too happy.  He wanted to use Theon as a hostage to barter for Moat Cailin.  Ramsay tells his father that he already treated with Balon Greyjoy and that he didn’t care about getting his son back.  Roose is angry that Ramsay has taken such actions without his leave.  To prove his power over Theon, Ramsay has him shave him with a straight razor.  Ramsay continues to talk to his father about where Bran and Rickon may be and about how Roose stabbed Robb and killed him.  Ramsay tells Theon he is sorry, because he knows Robb was like a brother to him.  We see a hint of emotion cross Theon’s face, but he must let it go or it may cost him more body parts.  He even tells the Boltons that Jon Snow is at the Wall so Bran and Rickon may have gone there for refuge.

Tyrion and Jaime are dining together.  Tyrion eats while Jaime sulks in his chair.  Jaime confides that he can no longer fight since he doesn’t have the use of his right hand.  He can hold a sword with his left, but can’t swing it.  Tyrion tells him to get someone to teach him, someone that will keep his secret, Bronn.  Jaime meets with him and Bronn gives him no mercy.

Varys comes to see Tyrion to tell him that Cersei’s handmade knows about Shae and has informed his sister.  Varys says he can get Shae across the sea where she will be safe, but Tyrion tells Varys that Shae won’t leave.  Later, Joffrey has sort of a bachelor’s feast.  Cersei notices Shae and points her out to Tywin.  He tells her to have her brought to the Tower of the Hand before the wedding.  Gifts are bestowed upon an ungrateful Joffrey.  Mace Tyrell gives him a large goblet made of gold and encrusted with jewels.  Tyrion gives him a book of tales of four of the greatest kings of Westeros and Lord Tywin presents him with the second Valyrian sword forged from Ned Stark’s greatsword, Ice.  This is about the only present Joffrey likes and immediately puts it to use by slashing at the table and inches away from his family like a madman.

Tyrion meets with Shae and tells her that their friendship can no longer continue.  He tells her he has a ship waiting to take her to Pentos where she will have a house and servants.  She thinks he is afraid of his sister and her father, but says she is not.  He tells her she is a whore.  She cannot bear his children and he will be true to his wife, who can.  Bronn enters to take her to the ship, but she slaps him and runs away crying.

Lady Melisandre burns more people as a sacrifice to her red god.  Stannis even lets her burn his brother in law.  Ser Davos tells Stannis he was wrong for letting those people burn.  Stannis and his wife eat with Melisandre.  Queen Selyse complains about their daughter, Shireen.  She thinks she is willfull and bad and wants to “take the rod” to her, but Stannis will not have it.  Selyse asks if Melisandre may talk to her.   Melisandre visits the young princess, but we only get to see the beginning of their conversation.

Hodor awakens Bran from a warg dream.  Jojen tells Bran that it is not good to spend so much time in Summers skin.  If he stays in Summer too long he might forget he is human.  They can’t lose him because he is everything.  They find a weirwood tree.  Bran touches it and sees visions.  It tells him to go North.

OMG, it’s the wedding of the century! (Finally!)  Margaery and Joffrey walk towards the Sept of Baelor for their vows.  Joffrey covers her with his cloak, as is tradition.  (Poor Margaery, and short wedding ceremony.)  Bronn tells Tyrion that Shae is on the boat.  There are all sorts of entertainers at the feast including contortionists and fire-eaters.  Lady Olenna comes to see Sansa and tells her she was sorry to hear about how her brother died and how she and Tyrion should travel to Highgarden for a visit.

Margaery seems intrigued by a singer, but he bores Joffrey so he throws money at him and tells him to leave.  Margaery talks Joffrey into letting her make an announcement that all of the leftovers from their wedding feast will be given to the poorest of the poor. 

Ser Loras is being a wallflower and exchanging wanton glances with Oberyn Martell.  Jaime bumps into him and asks if he is looking forward to his wedding to Cersei.  Of course Loras says yes, because what else is he to say.  Jaime warns him that if Cersei marries him, she will kill him in his sleep and if he is lucky enough to put a child in her before that happens, she will kill the child too.  Jaime says that Ser Loras will never marry Cersei and Loras retorts, “neither will you”.

Brienne comes to tell Joffrey and Margaery congratulations on their wedding.  Joffrey is pleased at first because he believes she killed Renly.  Margaery corrects him.  Cersei catches her to thank her for returning Jaime alive to Kings Landing.  Brienne says Jaime saved her life more than once, which brings out the jealousy in Cersei.  She makes a comment of Brienne serving Renly, then Catelyn and now her brother and how she changes who she serves like the wind.  She accuses Brienne of loving Jaime.  Brienne gives her a look and walks away.

Cersei tells Grand Maester Pycelle to tell the kitchen servants that the leftovers will be served to the kennel and not to the poor.  She is keen to show everyone that she is still queen and not Margaery.  Cersei and Tywin run into Oberyn and Elaria.  Oberyn makes a comment about Cersei not being queen anymore.  Cersei makes note that Elaria is a bastard.  So Oberyn brings up the fact that Cersei’s daughter, Myrcella, is living in Dorne.

Joffrey gets up and announces that there has been too much amusement and it is a royal wedding, which isn’t cause for amusement.  Joffrey has arranged for a spectacle of his own.  The mouth of a giant lion opens up and all sorts of dwarves come out dressed as the five kings to recreate the war.  Tyrion isn’t too happy about the show.  Ser Loras leaves after they make fun of Renly while poor Sansa has to sit there watching a “comedic” reenactment of her brother’s demise.  Joffrey giggles like a schoolboy while the “Joffrey dwarf” thrusts into the wolf’s head.  Not many others at the wedding table seem amused at the entertainment. 

Joffrey decides that Tyrion should go play with the dwarves, but Tyrion says he has had enough taste of battle and thinks Joffrey should go show them how brave he was during the Battle of Blackwater.  Joffrey takes a glass of wine and poors it on Tyrion’s head.  He then tells Tyrion to be his cupbearer and drops and kicks the goblet for Tyrion to find.  Sansa gets up and helps her husband.  He tells Tyrion to kneel, but Margaery sees the wedding pie and causes distraction.  Joffrey takes his new sword and cuts the pie open and doves come out.  Tyrion and Sansa try and leave, but Joffrey notices.  He bids Tyrion to bring him his wine.  Joffrey drinks it and starts choking uncontrollably.  Jaime runs to his side, as does Cersei.  He starts throwing up.  Ser Dontos comes out of nowhere and tells Sansa she must come with him now.

As Joffrey’s face turns black and he can no longer breathe, he points to Tyrion.  Cersei immediately points the finger at Tyrion as well and has the guards take him away.

End credits…

Finally, the little piss-ant is dead!  Great look on his face as he was dying, though I will miss the actor Jack Gleason.  He was such a good douchebag.  So, did Tyrion kill Joffrey?  Most likely not, but it looks as though he may take the fall.  Finally the North has some revenge, even if it wasn’t by their hand.  Unfortunately we still have to deal with the Lannister’s as Joffrey has a younger brother Tommen.  His mother should be able to control him since he is around seven years old.  If he has to marry Margaery he may not make it to adult hood.  She seems to be the black widow.  First Renly, now Joffrey…

#gameofthrones